3am sucks

That is all


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4 responses to “3am sucks”

  1. Melissa Green Avatar
    Melissa Green

    I know, darling. As does 4am or 5am. Night birds are singing the daylight back to us, at least they are here in the trees near the marsh. Breathe, Rachel. Make some herb tea. If you can’t sleep, don’t thrash and toss. Find paper, a pen. Write a word, something, anything, and another–if you can only pull two out of the air, write them over and over. I”m awake. I’m with you, if only in spirit. These arsenic hours will pass. xo

    1. Thankfully I didn’t make it to 4am. I could feel the hunger coming on at 3, knowing if I couldn’t fall back asleep until 4 I’d be in trouble and start eating something. I was tossing and thrashing trying to get comfortable with a cat on my legs. I need to be better about writing at such hours, but I get terribly grumpy. I know those birds well. What are they doing up so early?! When I worked night shifts in Texas they would be my call to go to sleep – I knew then the sun was coming up in a few hours. I’d go down at 4 am and wake up at noon. I don’t miss that life.
      I love that you call them “arsenic hours.” I love knowing you were here in them. I remembered something in the darkness that I was finally able to get down this morning. I can’t say I hate 3am as much as it scares me what it reveals sometimes.
      xo

  2. I know what you mean, sweet Rachel. You are not alone. xo

    1. It’s happening more and more that when I wake up in those early hours, I can’t go back to sleep. I’m sure it has nothing to do with anxiety, stress, life choices, mistakes…
      xo

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