RachelVB.com

Category: wandering mind

  • The weight of a messenger bag

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    rachelvb
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    “You should stand up straight,” a bald man said as I passed him on the sidewalk this morning. He kept looking back and forth like a security camera, staring at people to the point of swallowing. My green messenger bag has become a bookshelf and each morning I go through my apartment picking which ones…

  • Chapter One

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    rachelvb
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    I have a section dropping tonight, but I don’t want to work on it. I don’t want to start. I don’t want to puzzle together recipes and cutlines and fix widows and worry about cramming all those words into such a small space. I don’t give a shit about dog legs today. I want to…

  • All the cracks

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    rachelvb
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    Ms. Moon, There was another shoe this morning. The previous pair was gone, but replaced by a lone woman’s black slip on. I’d suspect a shoe-exchange if there was a match, but it sat there soggy around people waiting for the bus. Last night it poured like it hasn’t poured since the monsoons. Early this…

  • Old hat

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    rachelvb
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    The city is cold this morning, 61 degrees, windy and cold. The strange thing about the desert is when the sun isn’t around, even though it’s 61 degrees, it gets bone-chilling. The ground is a solar blanket. A homeless man picks through a trash can. I think about offering him my banana and pull it…

  • Hindsight 20/40

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    rachelvb
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    Dear Kentucky GRILLED Chicken, who are you fooling? I realize I haven’t posted anything for a week. I’ve been feeling quiet. Even now, I’m not sure I want to be here or what I even want to say, but I’m tired of trying to take artistic pictures of my cat in our bathtub, so writing…

  • Polly Dolly Doodles

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    rachelvb
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    I lost my beets. I went looking for them this morning to make a beautiful beet salad for lunch and I remembered that when I took them out of the oven on Sunday, I left them on the counter wrapped in tin foil and promptly forgot about them. And now they’ve run off. They probably…

  • I

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    rachelvb
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    This is how I spent yesterday. Pretending I have no idea what December feels like. Snow? Rain? ha! Vitamin D. I know what that is. And I’m absolutely loving it. As you can tell from the photo, we had a very relaxing weekend. Mixed with my anxiety that I wasn’t doing enough, combined with a…

  • Pumpkin Guilt

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    rachelvb
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    I have a confession to make. As of yesterday, I still had a Halloween pumpkin sitting on my doorstep… It wasn’t carved because this year, unlike every other year, I just never got around to it and Halloween came and we didn’t get any tricker-treaters, so I guess that worked out, but I usually carve…

  • No pain. No happiness. No anger. Air

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    rachelvb
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    Every movement was painful and slow. Methodical and heavy. She walked on nails to a seat and fell in. Pulled closer the Hawaiian floral backpack on her lap. Her body was floating – half in water, half in tar. She crossed her worn gray Keds, opened her pitched-roof mouth. Next to her, a graying man…

  • 800 lb ghosts

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    rachelvb
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    My body feels like it’s 800lbs this morning. It weaves in and out of the past. Every day is a new life, but our bodies forget nothing. Sometimes all it takes is a dark photograph of you and a person and your body remembers their smell, their hair, even the weight of their head against…