Category: wandering mind
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I am torn as a mother. I am mended
On our walk, I don’t question the nocturnal nature of crickets as I hear one chirping confidently in daylight, the fact that it’s morning, that it’s winter. But winter here is the taste of citrus on a cool breeze with warm tendrils promising warm days. We run over a decomposing bird with Jack’s red tricycle.…
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Kindness is cool
I miss this guy today. Although, I’m too tired to possibly run after him if we were home. That’s how it is though, right? You can’t wait to put them to bed and have some alone time, but the minute you put them to bed for some alone time, you miss the crap out of…
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Great with Child
‘Great with Child,’ Beth Ann Fennelly. Sometimes, I’m afraid to really start writing again because my heart has changed so much, feels as Fennelly says ‘endangered’ and I’m still trying to navigate the new terrain. I feel more acutely than I ever have before and I’m a poet, so that’s a hell of a lot…
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Beautiful Boy
Where did he come from?! Sometimes I look at him and see a little boy, the person he will be. His face seems so old in certain light. I mostly see it when he’s sleeping in my arms, when it’s 3am and delirium has cloaked everything. Maybe it’s not so much delirium as it is…
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There is no end to this love
He’s going down so much easier these days. Thanks, daycare. This morning he fell asleep within minutes after I picked him up from his jumperoo. Even a few weeks ago, I’d have to rock and rock and rock-bounce, rock bounce bounce until he slowly closed his eyes. He’s growing up before mine. I held him…
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‘Today, we’re younger than we’re ever gonna be.’ -Regina Spektor
I guess day care is alright … they at least inform parents when their clothes are inside out. But I miss my guy this morning. We’ve been sick. Cold number 2 in 3 months. Good track record… He’s the happiest, sick baby I’ve ever seen and other than the cough/congestion, you’d never know. The joys…
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Jack
I’ve been trying to do this post for a few days, but can’t upload photos from my phone for some reason. I’ll update this with a few things I want to remember from the last few surreal days. Jack Michael O’Farrell was born on Monday, October 13 2014 at 2:22am. He weighed 8lbs 10oz and…
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Still waiting. Still walking
Today is my last day at work. The only thing I can equate it to is the last day of school, but with bills and adulthood and, like, still having to face labor and not getting to sleep in. Yesterday, I went to the doctor and I’m already 4cm and I haven’t had to do…
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36-39 Weeks
Slow news day. Things are happening, slowly, which my mom says is a good thing. Rationally, I agree with her. I wonder what in the baby’s mind flips the switch? Nature is weird, man. Why all of the sudden does the lightbulb turn on and it’s time for the baby to peace out? I have…