WTF were you thinking?

Yesterday, I pretended I was in college and had bottomless mimosas with a work friend, her sister and Pat Pat in Scottsdale the land of fake tan boobs, west coast hipsters and $800 massages. Let’s just say they are serious when they mean bottomless mimosas and this morning after downing water, tortilla chips and coffee, I realized I’m not in college anymore…

I’ve been having dreams, tons of dreams and every morning I wait in bed with my eyes shut hoping to hang on to them only to have them slip the moment I sit up. Water, buildings, doors, windows, animals, missed people – I feel like these are the players in them, but what they do and when is totally lost in daylight. The only dream I can actually remember is one about the LA Fitness opening up next to our complex and them giving us a super discount of $10 a month. When I told Pat about that one, he said we needed more exciting lives. But more exciting lives leads to pretending you are in college and waking up hungover on a Monday morning remembering you took a shot of tequila from some chick standing on a bar in fishnets and white hot pants.